Energy Drink Roundup

Written by Clive Webster

March 14, 2009 | 00:00

Tags: #caffeine #energy-drinks #pussy #taste

Companies: #bit-tech #relentless #test

Energy drinks are a staple of the average gamer's diet - the average LAN party goer will consume up to three cans of energy drink per day, and attendees' desks are often littered with empty cans. However, there are a lot of energy drinks out there vying for your LANing attention, and some taste better than others. We've got ten cans and bottles of various drink to see just how tasty or nasty they are.

On test are:
  • Jolt CX2 Cola
  • Jolt CX2 Passion Fruit
  • Bawls Guarana Original
  • Bawls Guarana Cherry
  • Pussy
  • Relentless
  • Mountain Dew Revolution
  • Mountian Dew SuperNova
  • Mana Potion
  • Jolt Endurance Shot - wild grape flavour
Rich and Harry were joined by Clive and Mark for testing. A fresh cup was used for each drink, and the drink was consumed by everyone (unless they really objected) to give a fair and balance opinion of the flavour.

As the keen-eyed reader will have spotted, we've made up the statisitics in the opening paragraph. We would like to stress that excessive consumption of any of the drinks on test may cause unwanted and/or alarming side effects however. Please remember to drink in moderation, and to refer to the manufacturer's recommendations if you have concerns as to the affects of any of these drinks. We're not joking about that bit.

Energy Drink Roundup Introduction to Energy Drinks
Click to enlarge

The following is a transcription of the test. We apologise for any silliness or immaturity - it was the drink what done it, honest. That and the fact someone called their drink 'Pussy'...

Rich: I’ve drunk too much already today.

Harry: Chugging Pepsi all day already? Bring it on…

Clive: We’re going to testing a range of energy drinks – jolt cola, and some other stuff. Harry’s playing with some Mana Potion.

Mark: Most of which have obscene names.

Clive: Yeah, I’m not sure how wer’re going to deal with those.

Rich: We haven’t checked what’s the lethal dose of caffeine for a human in a day is actually.

Clive: [Laughs]

Energy Drink Roundup Introduction to Energy Drinks Energy Drink Roundup Introduction to Energy Drinks
Click to enlarge

Mark: Yeah, maybe we should do before we get started.

Clive: Errr, it’s fine, we’ll just plough through. So, shall we get some glasses out and test the first one?

Harry: Which one d’we want to crack open first? Shall we go with something safe?

Rich: The Jolt Cola?

Clive: Your choice – pour us out four shots of Jolt
Discuss this in the forums
YouTube logo
MSI MPG Velox 100R Chassis Review

October 14 2021 | 15:04